[15] - [Voice]

[sharpememory]

[Filtered to the wardens (minus Prefect)]

Look, guys. I don't know how your system works. I'm not sure if that's deliberate or not. But I want you all to know, those things that I did because of that flood? There was no way Prefect could of done anything about that. The guy can't see the future. He doesn't have a little window into my brain. I just want to make clear that that was all firmly my bad and not his. I'd be seriously concerned if any of you guys were holding that against him or questing whether he should be here. He's doing the best job he can.

[Private - Loki]

Sorry about the whole lying thing, man. Inmate. It's what we do.

[Private - Prefect]

So, I started another new journal. Just FYI.

[Filtered to Beatty and O'Brien]

I imagine that if you two stay away from me and my warden we won't have any problems in future. We can all just be the best of friends. From a distance.

Comments

SPAMTASTIC

[buywithme.livejournal.com]

I didn't tell him that because I thought he would physically hurt you, Barron, I told him it because he let you mess up my memories, and by extension, your memories, just so he could have the satisfaction of turning you in. [Prefect looks quite serious.] I don't think he would physically hurt you, I don't think he'd even try to get revenge for you trying to kill him, but I think he would let you hurt yourself so that he could feel in control, just like Anton and Philip did.

SPAMTASTIC

[sharpememory.livejournal.com]

[That got a long, long pause out of Barron. After a second he shrugged, smiled.] Man, you have no idea what you're talking about. We were a team.

SPAMTASTIC

[buywithme.livejournal.com]

Who? You, Anton and Philip? [Prefect folds his arms and frowns.] What did you actually get out of killing Zacharov that you couldn't have gotten by just continuing to do exactly as you were? You clearly got paid enough for just making people disappear.

SPAMTASTIC

[sharpememory.livejournal.com]

[Barron pauses, trying to think of a reason. Because guess what has leaked out of his head.] It was more than that. It was about getting into the family.

[He thinks. That seems logical, doesn't it?]

Re: SPAMTASTIC

[buywithme.livejournal.com]

It was about Philip. Anton was his friend, and if he'd become the boss of the family, then Philip would have profited from it. They needed you to make it work, but what would you have actually gotten out of it? [He was quiet for a moment. Letting the thought sink in.] They needed you. Cassel wouldn't have agreed to it without you, and he would have broken down from the guilt afterward, but you weren't their equal. Not to them.

SPAMTASTIC

[sharpememory.livejournal.com]

I would have profited too. [Barron said quickly, defensively.] And since I was so necessary, they would have recognized that.

Re: SPAMTASTIC

[buywithme.livejournal.com]

Cassel was necessary, were you planning on cutting him in on the profits? [Prefect frowned and shook his head.] They would have moved on to bigger and better things, and they would have kept you and Cassel exactly where you were, because he made a great assassin, and you were good for cleaning up afterward.

Re: SPAMTASTIC

[sharpememory.livejournal.com]

[Barron just stared for a second. A very long second.] You don't know anything!

[And with that very mature outburst, Barron got up and started walking to the door.]

SPAMTASTIC

[buywithme.livejournal.com]

What do you think they would have done, Barron? Do you really think it would have made sense to the boss of the crime family to do anything else with you, just because you were his best friend's little brother? [Prefect was on his feet as well now, and walking after Barron.]

Comrade, Do you think Anton cared if you'd wake up one day not remembering your own name, as long as you kept working for him? [He reached for Barron's arm, trying to catch him by the elbow and stop him from leaving.]

Barron, if I'm wrong then tell me why? Tell me why you don't believe this? Because no one came to me, from when you had your power back. You didn't even use your power for yourself. You just changed my memories, changed O'Brien's memories, and threw your memories away keeping your end of the deal, and I really really don't understand.

SPAMTASTIC

[sharpememory.livejournal.com]

[Barron's first instinctive response was to shove Prefect away, and storm out of the room. It would have been very satisfying, but not very useful in the long term.]

You're so right. [Barron said through his teeth, although it was painfully obvious that Prefect was completely and utterly wrong.] You're right about everything. It didn't make any sense at all, did it?

[He wasn't sure if that sounded believable, but it was better than fighting with Prefect and getting rid of whatever trust they'd established.]

SPAMTASTIC

[buywithme.livejournal.com]

You don't have to agree with me, Barron. [Prefect said, his voice suddenly much, much softer. Placating, even.] Just explain it to me. Tell me why I'm wrong, please.

SPAMTASTIC

[sharpememory.livejournal.com]

I don't want to talk about this. [Barron snapped. But just this once, he had an excellent excuse not to. One he wouldn't normally use.] I don't even remember it.

SPAMTASTIC

[buywithme.livejournal.com]

[...Well, Prefect wasn't expecting that, even if he should have been.] That's good. It means that this is all hypothetical for you, Comrade. [He paused for a moment though. It... did seem a little weird to talk about something Barron didn't even remember doing. Maybe Prefect could approach it from a different angle some other time...]

...In that case, perhaps we should talk about O'Brien and Beatty? That was what we were going to discuss originally, before we got sidetracked.

SPAMTASTIC

[sharpememory.livejournal.com]

If it's hypothetical, why are we talking about it? [Barron said, seeing the loophole and driving straight for it. It was a long shot, but who knew?]

Well, I guess we can. [Barron crossed his arms, radiating discomfort.] About what O'Brien made me do.

SPAMTASTIC

[buywithme.livejournal.com]

Because while right now you don't remember these things, so you can treat them as hypothetical situations, they still happened. Understanding why you make the choices you do, and how you see the world, is important.

[Prefect raises his eyebrows, but nods all the same.] All right, Comrade, could you tell me what O'Brien made you do?

SPAMTASTIC

[sharpememory.livejournal.com]

[Barron launched into his description of what O'Brien had done, mainly because it meant that he could ignore the fact that Prefect had made a good point.]

He basically tricked me into doing it. It took a while to work out, but he just so obviously wanted it to happen. It was probably his way of getting back at me.

[For what, Barron wasn't quite sure.]

SPAMTASTIC

[buywithme.livejournal.com]

[Prefect frowned, knitting his forehead]

Comrade, you didn't do anything to him though. There wasn't anything to get back at you for.

SPAMTASTIC

[sharpememory.livejournal.com]

That you know of. [Barron paused, reconsidering what he's just said.] What we know of. Have you asked him?

SPAMTASTIC

[buywithme.livejournal.com]

No, Comrade, but I remember what you were doing before the flood. You'd been changing my memory, to make me forget that you had your power, and every week he was reminding you to do it again. In exchange, you were removing painful memories of his. [Prefect paused then, allowing Barron a moment to digest that, before adding:] That arrangement only ended because he betrayed you, Comrade.

And... because Beatty attacked me. I think that threw off your routine.

SPAMTASTIC

[sharpememory.livejournal.com]

Well, that's pretty obviously him messing with me, isn't it? [It seemed like the type of thing Barron would have instigated, but he was keeping mum on that. He does look decidedly unamused when he hears about the betrayal and Beatty attacking Prefect.]

Well, that sounds like I was provoked.